Relationships Part I

I.

I'm trying to figure out relationships. I tend to look at this subject from an anthropological/scientific point of view, and unfortunately that kind of outsider perspective tends to confine me to the margins of the social scene. I can't see the forest for the trees, or whatever; I end up excluding myself for being too analytical. Not to say analyzing men and women from a scientific viewpoint isn't useful. "Theoretically" it could give one an advantage. The problem, at least I have found, is that so much of dating and relationships and the quest for a mate falls outside the realm of the logical. There's very little logic or methodology involved. Rather it is all instinct and base human emotions that lie somewhere (to put a scientific spin on it) in the reptilian core of our animal brains.

Indeed, dating and mating is the one thing in this postmodern world that remains rooted deep in the past. While customs and mores change over time, the fundamentals of the game stay the same.

Yes, the relationship game is one of those things where thinking too much is bad. Like walking on a balance beam, or, say, pulling off a skateboarding trick like kick-flipping a set of stairs. It takes effort, but at some point the more conscious effort you put in, the more likely you are to land on your face. The recipe for success remains inscrutable; the whole thing is inchoate and immune to logic. On this warped chess board, you're not necessarily going to knock out the competition by being a Gary Kasparov. A bit of plotting and logical scheming may help in certain instances, and one can think of many, but overall, in essence it does not.

The more you think, the less you're likely to figure it out and, ultimately, to succeed.

So don't think.